6.10.15

Despite everything

 

I've made very few of my own personal creations this year; partly because I am still struggling to recover my creativity after the awful, life changing events of 2013. *Warning* This is an old post that some people who don't know what happened may find upsetting, but I've put it in, as this is to some extent my personal blog and anyhow, it's been 'out there' since it happened.

Grief doesn't just stop once the initial agony subsides; it continues to send out ripples and in my case, this has meant a rather grey no-man's land as far as inspiration goes. Bit of a problem when your only income is creatively based.


So I have been busy flogging whatever I can on eBay, to pay the bills. Once upon a time, this wasn't such an issue, but my circumstances now mean that anything which doesn't bring in an income has to be forfeited in favour of things which do. But I have cobbled together a few things. Just to keep my hand in.


These odd looking beasties - 'Hawses' - were a bit of a self indulgent experiment and a move away from my mainstream cute style. If nothing else, it was good to try something different.


The rest has been more familiar work. I've fiddled about unsuccessfully with different ideas, including the 'Teddy Bear of Doom'. One of the most difficult things I have ever attempted, shown here at halfway stage. Limbless, unloved and a bit wistful. Little blighter.



On another note, my kits have found their way to Berlin, via the gorgeous AMODO shop - I feel as if I have gone international, albeit in a very small way!
  
But sadly, a squirrel and a simple circus bear have been pretty much the only finished work so far this year.  



I continue to weather things out and as always, try to look on the bright side. Despite everything that has happened, and some recent health issues, I have so many blessings in my life and count them every day.

15 comments:

Acornmoon said...

I absolutely love your circus bear. You are so clever Gretel, to be able to work in both 2D and 3D. Congratulations on the international shop too! Ada send her love and want you to know that she now has two brand new rollers. xxx

millefeuilles said...

Dear Gretel,

Your creations never fail to amaze me. Please know that I am thinking of you. I too have been through a horrendous time. 2015 has forced me to be stronger than ever before but, like you, I am still hanging in there and counting my blessings.

Warmest wishes from France.

Stephanie x

the woolly dog said...

A lot of us bloggers think of you at this time of year Gretel. Your lovely sea 'hawses' are certainly a step in a different direction, they look slightly strange and magical. Congratulations on your kits, it would be great if you could get enough creations together for an exhibition? take care. x

Granny Sue said...

These are so fun, so creative. The little bear...

Great loss is a heavy burden. So many carry it, and carry on, and the world scarcely notices. It took me a long time to learn to be happy again, and then to not feel guilt for being happy. Sending hugs and a thought that you are not alone on this path, though it surely will feel that way often enough. Keep creating; get lost in it--what a gift you have.

Barbara Prime said...

The little hawses are sweet. I especially like the one with patches. Isn't it nice to try something a little different, sometimes?

I've been struggling with my creative work this year too. Although, in my case it's caused by too many other things demanding my time, and feeling like I have no space to relax and enjoy my work. I'm sure we all get like that sometime. I hope it will change in another year, when my younger boy goes to school, because some days I would really just like to quit!

I hope things get better for you as time passes.

Frances said...

Gretel, it is my belief that everything that you do is infused with a unique creative spirit. Be it photographing insects, baking cakes, observing pigs or gardens or clouds, or drawing, or painting, or sculpting treasures from wisps of wool.

Brilliant all, beautiful lady! xo

Mac n' Janet said...

Have followed you for quite some time, so I know the struggle you're going through. Time will heal, but slowly until the good remains and the other fades. Love the circus bear.

Vicki said...

Grief has no timetable nor does it just end, never to return. Our normal up and down days become less normal when grief is present. You are so gifted and like most people who are creative artists, you are driven by your heart. That also adds to the grief element. I hope that these gray days pass soon and you will find a spark of creativity that will soon lead to a raging desire and ability to create your lovely and whimsical little creatures that we all love so much. In the meantime, you will be in my prayers.

Charlotte said...

Love to you in so many ways. xxx

5 Ladybird Lane said...

I've been reading your blog for a long time and through your unbelievably sad times, but one thing that always brings me back is your beautiful creations. It must be so difficult when your finances rely on your creativity, because sometimes even the most creative people just don't feel creative!! Sarah

Lin said...

You've been through a lot. Be kind to yourself.

Caroline B said...

It's a sad fact that in order to be creative, you have to be in the right state of mind, it can't just be turned on. I think you have done brilliantly under the circumstances and I'm sure inspiration will return in time.

Vintage Jane said...

Time is a great healer and there are many of us thinking of you. Hope your health issues are not too troublesome. The little squirrel is gorgeous - you are so talented. M x

Celia Hart said...

I love the squirrel! And thank you for leaving a comment on my blog. Grief doesn't have a timetable, you're being so strong and positive, your creativity will return.

Take care
love C xx

BumbleVee said...

I love that little bear... and, where is the yellow one now? ...is he still languishing somewhere? .. poor little guy.... I wanna see him finished......

I'm very bad Gretel... haven't been making the rounds much ...but, now that I'm back to checking things...and back scrolling ...a LOT ...I aim to try to keep up. hahahhahhaha... don't hold me to it...but, I'll try ...along with other things I've promised to do!