20.7.12

Goodbye Mouse





Goodbye darling Mousie, most precious of cats. You were born into my hands thirteen years ago, one of Clover's kittens. She sat on you a lot and I was constantly rescuing you from suffocation . You were 'my' kitten and I loved you deeply  from the second I held you.





 You were the runt, a wee grey blob, only a few inches long. I called you 'Mouse' and whispered it into your ear so that you would know your name, still damp from the womb. 






Once, after a car accident, you went missing  but you somehow found your way home, clawing away for dear life at the conservatory door a week later.  I'd been broken hearted and resigned to you never returning.  I had lain on the sofa for days in a dark pit of despair, weeping with joy when you came back to us in the middle of the night.  We called you 'the Mouse that Returned'.






Thankfully that was your last big adventure. You had ten quiet and happy years at our tiny cottage in West Oxfordshire. You went skedaddle in the April winds and basked in the sun. In winter you retired to the sofa and slept, a plump mouse waiting for spring. 






You never demanded attention, nor caused a nuisance. You were quiet, unassuming and humble -  a mouse who knew her position in the scratching order and was happy there. You loved your head being scroffled and scraps of Marmite toast.





You hated our recent move but as usual, you were quiet in your corner. Maybe too quiet. When you started being sick, we thought you had furballs. You were sick so much that we took you to the vet and in the end you were put on a drip. You behaved as always, sweetly and gently. The mouse who purred until the very  end.





It wasn't furballs. It was a 'mega-esophagus', more common in dogs then cats. You couldn't get your food down your throat, hence the last few weeks of sickness. We would gladly have paid for an operation, but there is nothing to do with this, except try to manage it - and you had pneumonia setting in too. So thin, so weak and already elderly. As I broke down over the phone, the vet said that you had been 'a sweetheart'. You were comfortable and asleep and I gave consent for the last injection, so that you wouldn't know about it.  I haven't hurt so much for a long, long time.





You were a small, rather plain cat, precious to no-one except us. I don't have enough tears to shed for you, though God knows I've been crying all afternoon.  You have left a huge hole in our lives for such a quiet creature and a piece of me has gone with you.



70 comments:

Lorna said...

Sorry for her passing.

lisbonlioness said...

I have no words. Crying for your beloved companion, sending you all my love.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry for your loss. They are family members, too. It hurts so much to lose them. Sending comforting purrs from three German cats to you.
~Stephanie

The Fabric of my life said...

Oh Gretel my love :-(

I sit here with tears of sorrow for you rolling down my face. I can understand how you must be feeling. As a cat lover and owner of 3 elderly cats, I dread the day that I have to say goodbye to any of them. Poor poor you.

I am so glad that Mouse found you though, what a wonderful, stress free, lovely life you gave her. Big hugs xxx

Louise Peers said...

So sorry to hear about your precious Mouse :( x

Kim said...

I'm so sorry to hear... I feel your pain...it'll get better...eventually...

Julia Guthrie said...

safe journey Mouse... a true companion. Loved by all...as I shed a tear for the lovely human family you have left behind.
xxxxxxxxxxx

Elin said...

this post brings tears to my eyes. Im so sorry for your loss, i send a big hug to you and your family <3

d. moll, l.ac. said...

So sorry, good-bye sweet mouse, so loved, so loved <3

The Pea Pod said...

I'm so so sorry for the loss of dear Mouse, how sad xxxx

Tracy x said...

i am so so sorry.. losing part of you, part of your family, part of your heart is simply awful..
take time to remember dear mouse and take time to heal..
its all you can do
t x

Gerry Snape said...

sorry sorry Gretel...I sobbed for weeks when Tom went 2 years ago and I could cry now if I let myself go.

. said...

Cried reading through, but at the same time thinking what a beautiful tribute to Mouse this is. So sorry for your loss, may he live in your hearts forever.

Erica-Jane Waters said...

Oh Gretel, all my sympathy and hugs to you tonight sweetheart xxxxxxxxxx

acornmoon said...

Thinking of you and Mouse, I am so sorry, xxx

peli said...

so sad to hear that...your post made me cry...you have my sympathy and all my thoughts...so sorry :(
hugs xxx

Mary Beth said...

I am so very, very sorry!

Yarrow said...

Oh Gretel, I am so very sorry. My tears are flowing for you and your dear sweet mouse. She couldn't have asked for better or more heartfelt words.xxx

Tara Chang said...

Oh Gretel. SO sorry for the loss of your furry friend. Big condolences and hugs from afar. I know how painful it is and what a big hole they leave in our hearts when they go...

Charlotte said...

Dear Gretel and Andy,
thinking of you. They leave such holes, let the hole fill with memories and let grief take its time.
Cxxx

flwrjane said...

Oh dear, I lost my constant companion just last week.

Almost unbearable.

Such a beautifully written eulogy. you've got me crying for both our losses.

Janepubjugg 16

rossichka said...

Dear Gretel, if I was near you, I would give you a hug. I can imagine how you and Andy are feeling. Some years ago we lost our dearest dog Mixy and we can't stop remembering him with smiles and tears... It still hurts a lot! We will ever miss him and love him...
I'm so sorry for the loss of your true and devoted friend and companion! I'm sure Mouse had a wonderful life with you - at a quiet place, free, loved and happy!
xxx

Nancy said...

I know exactly how you feel and I'm so sorry. My best bud was my Manz Uther and I still miss him after about 3 years.
Hugs to you both!

the veg artist said...

So sorry, I've been there too, with my beloved Rupert. Some of them are just so special.

Pearl said...

Oh my goodness I am so sad for you. It is so awful when we lose our babies. Sending you hugs,

Lin said...

Aw,Gretel, I'm SO sorry. There is no sadness like that of losing a good cat friend. They just quietly share so much with us. It's a big loss, you know?

Sending love and hugs for you all. I know that pain all too well and about all you can do is cry. Know that we care during this very difficult and sad time.

Lo said...

Sob. I did not know her before, but I do now from your beautiful eulogy and I am crying for her and for you.

Sending hugs. Just know you gave her a great life.

ellen said...

Dearest Gretel,
No words can make this any easier.
Sending love to you and Andy.
There is a huge hole, there is a space that will not be filled, there is such loss.
There is also the spirit of love given and returned...to be held forever.
xoxo Ellen.

Cindy Garber Iverson said...

I know the words "I'm sorry" aren't nearly enough. I know all too well after losing my precious puffy princess in May. I know how hard it is to make the decision. She loves you for making the right one. She is yours forever. Don't ever forget that.

Cindy at Rosehaven Cottage

Anonymous said...

This is heartbreaking and I am so sorry for your loss. I have been reading all of your blog but this post has made me want to contact you and send you condolences and hope that you find peace for your aching heart. Dear little Mouse, what a blessing animals are, and what a lucky little Mouse that she had you to love her for her whole life.
Linda

Soozcat said...

Oh, Mouse... Oh, Gretel, I'm so sorry.

Caroline B said...

So sorry - there is nothing quite like the sorrow of losing a beloved pet and friend. Hugs,
Caroline x

lemonade kitty said...

So sorry for the loss of your beloved "Mouse" sleeping peacefully, Lucey x

Alix said...

What a beautiful tribute to your beloved cat. I am so sorry for your loss.
x

Claire said...

Hey Gretel, as I sit here on the couch with Tigger by my side, nudging my hand wanted a scratch and purring loudly........I feel your loss and your pain........

What a wonderful post about a dear sweet little Mouse who found a place in your heart and life. Lovely photos specially of her sitting in the swan.....A much loved and loving furry companion.

Hugs to you and Andy,

CLaire x

Chloe said...

So sorry x

Chloe said...

So sorry x

elizabeth said...

What a lovely Mousie, so beloved!
A great and sad loss.
I'm so sorry.

Shona said...

Gretel, I'm so sorry to learn of the loss of Mouse. We lost one of our cats a couple of months ago, so I understand the grief you're feeling right now. Today, the world may seem a little darker but the sun will return and, with it, the memories of all the smiles and laughs of cat-shaped antics. You will always have these memories and the knowledge that Mouse was *your* cat and had a truly wonderful home and life.

xx

Kathi said...

Oh Gretel, I am so sorry. I recently had the same experience with my Momma Cat. So, so sad. ((Hugs))

Frances said...

Gretel, this tribute to sweet Mouse has allowed us all the chance to also love this very special spirit.

I am glad to have been able to make Mouse's acquaintance. As a rather quiet being myself (true!) I very much welcome that quality in others.

Lots of love to you and Andy. xo

craftgirl78 said...

I am so sorry to hear that you have lost such a well-loved member of your family. I don't know what I would do if I ever lost my cats. Your post has moved me to tears.

Su said...

So sorry, what a very very special cat xx

yvette said...

Oh Gretel, I am so sorry, poor dear mouse, I have tears falling down my face too.....for you....for mouse....and for our dear Sophie who we had to do the same 4 weeks ago....
my thoughts and love to you....Yvette xxxx

Terri said...

Gretel and Andy I'm so so sorry to hear of your loss. All my thoughts are with you. xx

BumbleVee said...

awww .....no...... what a sad day .... hugs to you and Andy......... I loved hearing about your little 'Mousie'.. I once reared a little runt cat and she was a special, precious little girl to me too....

Natasha said...

So sorry to hear about Mouse. I know how sad you will both be, but she had the best life a cat could have with you both! xxx

Kari from Meadowview Farm said...

Tears for a cat, just tears...
My thoughts are with you.
Kari

Vicki H said...

Xxx

Mousy Brown said...

So sad...they are never forgotten but I hope the pain soon becomes less...my thoughts are with you x

Cristina said...

So sorry for your loss...I've been there before, I know the heartbreak...amy thoughts are with you. Hugs xx Cristina from Chippy

mirsini's creations said...

I'm deeply sorry about your precious furry friend and i know exactly how you feel...i have lost a couple of my furry friends..from sicknesses and poisons...it's very hard when we loose them...i know... but i can't stop rescuing cats from the jungle of the city...i still have 4 furry friends in my life...cats are so precious creatures !
Hugs to you....

Crafty Green Poet said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. She sounds like she was a wonderful cat...

Francie...The Scented Cottage Studio said...

oh Gretel, so sorry for the loss of sweet Mouse, she had a loving home for her lifetime and that is a good thing. sending you a hug

Susan said...

I am so sorry ! "We" are so sorry for your loss & sadness. You have written such a lovely tribute to Mouse, another much loved & forever missed animal friend - the very best kind of friend. xo Susan & Gang

Blackbird Experience said...

:( so sorry. I'm sure Mouse loved you just as much

Jennifer said...

I'm so sorry, Gretel. What a beautiful cat. They bring so much to our lives and ask so little in return. xoxo

frayedattheedge said...

I'm crying with you - it is heartbreaking to lose a beloved pet ....

Gemma Mortlock said...

Oh Gretel! Your post made me cry, i am truly sorry for your loss, losing a pet always hurts so much! I send you hugs to try and mend your broken heart xxxxx

Tonia said...

So sorry to read about Mouse. Hugs from over the border xx

Vintage Jane said...

Dear Gretel - I have just caught up with your post and am so saddened to read of your loss. Such a heartbreaking but lovely post about your dear Mouse. I lost my favourite boy over 10 years ago now but still miss him. It is not until you have a cat that you realise just what characters and friends they can be. Wishing you well ... M xx

Cathy Holtom said...

So sad Gretel....my much loved dog also died last week, let's hope they're playing together somewhere.
Painting helps xx

Anonymous said...

Just caught up with your Mousie post. Oh Gretel, I cried. I know just how you feel - a piece of your heart has been torn out. Bless wee Mousie, she must have had a wonderful life with you. *Furryhugs* Jill x

Puddock said...

So sorry to hear that Mouse has died. She obviously had a wonderful, safe life with you and that's all you can ask. Take care of yourself. (())

mary said...

Gretel, I'm so very sorry about the loss of your Mouse. What a lovely little creature! I hope that in time you will be able to remember her more in smiles than in tears. All my best, hugs, Mary

Jeri Landers said...

I have 3 senior cats, it may not be long. Some pet passings hurt more than others. When my goose died, I cried for 3 days. I am glad that dear Mouse had a loving home, I am so sorry for her passing.

Val Reaves said...

I am so sorry...I lost a lovely dog this spring...still cry over her, and now for your loss as well.
Tears are the evidence of the love lost.....:-(

fishinkblog said...

Beautifully and poetically written, you made me shed a tear too and I didn't even know your cat ! Sorry to hear of your loss but glad you had ten good years and a whole host of amazing memories with that. She's off catching small things in another pasture.

Andyc said...

What a lovely lovely tribute to your special friend.....

Andyc said...

What a lovely lovely tribute to your special friend.....